“THERE are days when I just want to shout and shake my fist at the world for being so unfair, for threatening our life together, but Kate reminds me that one can always choose to be happy, to spread joy and battle bitterness with a smile.”
These are the words of Gemma, 36, from Somerset, who is making plans for her wife’s funeral. Her wife, Kate, 49, has been suffering from “brutal” seizures after a terrible accident during her late 20s.
She was told she would not live to see 40, but now – at nearly 50 – Kate feels she is “so lucky” to have been able to spend the last 14 years with Gemma.
“In my late 20s I’d married a man who ended up being so violent that he broke my neck and killed our seven month old son in one terrible accident,” said Kate.
“A year later, I started seizing and was diagnosed with epilepsy, a particularly violent form which the doctors assured me would mean that I wouldn’t live to see 40. No medication could stop me from seizing, and I seize two to four times a week, brutally.
“Each seizure is the rough equivalent of running back-to-back marathons. I’ve broken my own bones seizing. And each seizure could be the one that stops me from breathing too long, or is just slightly too hard on my heart, and bam, I never wake up.
“In spite of the fact I was previously married to a man and had never even considered looking at a woman for a romantic relationship, I fell in love with Gemma, who was a decade younger, the very first time I saw her in person.
“To my utter surprise, she loved me back. We’ve been inseparable ever since. I still can’t believe it.
“After I met Gemma, my seizures seemed to abate a bit. I experienced unimaginable joy the first 10 years we were together.
“But now I’m facing 50, and the seizures are doing what I was always told they would do - they are tearing me apart.”
Gemma worked full time to support them both, in a variety of roles – from factory worker to her current job as a train driver.
A few year’s ago Gemma’s identity was stolen and since then, the pair have been in unimaginable debt.
And so Kate wanted to do something to help Gemma once she has passed away – and so created a GoFundMe page.
The page, created just over a week ago, has now managed to raise more than £3,000 to help cover Kate’s funeral costs.
“The support and generosity we’ve seen has been fantastic,” added Gemma.
“I am so grateful for every message and every bit of advice that friends, family and strangers have given us.
“It means the world to us both and I am completely overwhelmed that so many people have stepped forward to help.
“I am terrified of what the future might look like but knowing that Kate can be put to rest without fear of carrying another debt as well as carrying that grief is so heartbreakingly wonderful.
“Each share, each donation and each message has affirmed to me, again and again, that when the inevitable happens, I will not be alone. Honestly, I can’t imagine life without her, however, I know that all this support and outpouring of love from people near and far has already gone a long way to allaying my fears.
"Kate is my best friend, my ray of sunshine and my north star. We’ve been ridiculously in love for almost 14 years.
“I would like to thank each and every person who has donated, shared the link or messaged their support. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.”
To donate visit https://uk.gofundme.com/f/aid-for-my-angel.
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