HOW do you feel when someone asks you to do something, and you really have to say no. Often for more than one reason; lack of money, lack of time, not feeling well, etc.

My first feeling is guilt. Guilt that I’m not being a good friend, relative, etc.

So, in the past I always just said yes, just to please other people. I’ve often ended up not enjoying what I had been asked to do, being out of pocket doing things I couldn’t afford, etc.

One of the things I learned when I was doing my mindfulness training was the importance of setting boundaries and saying no when necessary is indeed crucial for maintaining good mental health.

It's a skill that allows you to prioritize your well-being and manage your time and energy effectively.

Feeling guilty about saying no can be common, but it's important to recognize that you have the right to prioritize your needs and responsibilities.

I personally feel that guilt is a wasted emotion.

Saying yes to every request can lead to burnout and exhaustion. By saying no when needed, you protect your mental and emotional energy, allowing you to focus on what truly matters to you.

Healthy boundaries are essential for well-being. Saying no is a way of communicating and reinforcing your personal limits, which is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships and preventing feelings of overwhelm.

Saying no enables you to prioritise self-care. Taking time for yourself, whether it's for rest, relaxation, or pursuing activities you enjoy, is essential for mental health and overall well-being.

Overcommitting to tasks or obligations can lead to stress and anxiety. Saying no helps you manage your workload and reduces the pressure to meet unrealistic expectations.

Recognising your own needs and having the confidence to say no, when necessary, contributes to a positive self-image and helps build self-esteem. It's a way of valuing your time and priorities.

Learning to say no assertively is an important aspect of effective communication. It allows you to express yourself clearly and respectfully, contributing to healthier relationships.

While it's normal to want to help others and be a team player, it's equally important to prioritize your own well-being.

Learning to say no without feeling guilty is a skill that can be developed over time, and it's a valuable tool for maintaining a healthy work-life balance and overall mental health.

It is worth remembering though that sometimes when you want to say no but buckle and say yes for some unknown reason can sometimes end up being the best of times too! It is a juggling act, I guess.

With the preparations for Christmas in full flow, please can I urge everyone to support local shops and businesses when you can. We need to boost our own local economies.

See you again in two weeks! Until then – Stay Safe and Be Kind.