I WAS thinking the other day about things we say which almost certainly won’t come true.
“Stop picking your nose or your eyes will fall out.”
“Get a sweater on or you’ll catch your death…”
As a child I never saw an eye fall to the ground and I never heard of anyone who died from not wearing a sweater.
Then I was thinking about things we say that we don’t mean at all.
I might be on dangerous ground here, but I’ve never bought into the phrase: “Winning doesn’t matter – it’s the taking part that counts.”
I don’t think I’ve ever entered a race, played a game of football or challenged a friend at squash without being mightily disappointed if I was on the losing side!
On my wife’s last birthday she said to me: “Really… don’t buy me anything.”
I thought of putting that one to the test – then I thought better of it!
On a more serious note, when we ask someone how they’re feeling, are we really interested in what they say or is it just a gesture of politeness?
When they do reply: “Fine thank you, how are you”, do they really mean it?
For what it’s worth, if I’m talking to someone who I know is feeling down, I ask him or her twice. The second time it’s: “Now tell me how you’re REALLY feeling”.
If they don’t want to talk, they’ll soon tell you. But you might just be the listening ear they really need today.
I was fascinated recently to hear about the Orange Button scheme being run by Public Health in Somerset.
The idea is that if you see someone wearing the distinctive orange badge you know that they have had mental health training and can just talk to you if you’re feeling really depressed.
What a great idea. But we don’t need an orange button just to ask people: How are you REALLY feeling – and then listen properly to the reply.
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